I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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