I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
