You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
