So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
FUCK WHALES
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