I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
