Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
