that's an acceptable place to lick
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
