So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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