If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
