Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize