5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize