Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
40s are totally the cure
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
