he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
