i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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