There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize