Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
