if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
