At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.