do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
