I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
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There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
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So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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