This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
