I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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