true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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