If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
