You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
