How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.