what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
10+ Incredible Tumblr Stories That Will Leave You Shook
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!