It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
