I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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