You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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