i just wanna soil my oats bro
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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