If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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