I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
