she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize