Kiss
Puke
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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