what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
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