His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
