STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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