Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Sext me about skeletons
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
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