Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry mrwinning hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(203): View more from Connecticut

well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"

Fav 20 1487 5934
share tweet
(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".

Fav 10 2339 3751
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(248): View more from Michigan

Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars

Fav 10 5265 1405
share tweet
(317): View more from Indiana

Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?

Fav 10 877 3631
share tweet
(530): View more from California

I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will

Fav 4 3767 1025
share tweet
(704): View more from North Carolina

Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.

Fav 4 961 1565
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(914): View more from New York

Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?

Fav 10 2547 735
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(734): View more from Michigan

...hi

(603): View more from New Hampshire

YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF

(734): View more from Michigan

Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.

Fav 0 92 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".

Fav 1 30 59
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT