Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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