3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
