If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
