If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
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she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
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Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy