But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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