i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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