Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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