i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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