Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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