So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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